Posts Tagged "coaching"

Reacting to Lying in Ways that Bring Connection

In my role as coach, mediator, trainer, I say upfront my clients that I don’t have the answers, don’t diagnose and won’t advise. I focus my work on helping others uncover their longings, help see what’s getting in the way (often deep-seated pattern of behavior), and set the stage for finding creative new strategies that fulfill longings. So it’s no surprise that this approach allows me…

Prioritizing Self-Care (even when you think it’s impossible)

This time of year has always been the most challenging for me, especially when it comes to taking care of myself. It was as if life went into overdrive on all fronts: work deadlines, social obligations, kids’ school festivities, gifts, holiday cards, special foods, traveling, etc. Each of these seemed to come out of nowhere, wrapped in a package labeled “URGENT!” And I’d take on each…

Rediscovering Self-Connection

I am all too familiar with the theme of disconnection from myself. I don’t see it in a purely negative light, but something like this: As children, we want more than anything love, appreciation and acceptance for who we are. Yet the world around us tries to shape us into “proper” self-reliant individuals. Within our unique frameworks, we develop multiple strategies to get these and other…

Emotions, useful? You bet – here’s the why and how

It’s not often I enjoy a “kid film” as much as I did this past summer’s Pixar hit, Inside Out. I laughed, I cried, I felt connected with myself (as things resonated with me) and also with my eight-year old daughter whose hand I squeezed all throughout. I kept thinking, “How wonderfully healthy for her and all other children to be watching this movie!” At some…

How to get unstuck, gain balance, and feel more satisfied in life

Are you wondering how to get unstuck? Does this sound familiar? “I am always doing, in survival mode, juggling parenting, work, household duties, volunteering, social activities—and find myself in certain routines and patterns. How do I deal better with my chaotic and full head and experience more relaxation, satisfaction and balance in my life?” I asked myself a similar question the year I turned 40, engaged…

Resolutions for Developing Positive Habits? It Starts with Inner Awareness

Another article posted online (http://www.amsterdam-mamas.nl/stories/this-month/developing-positive-habits) and here . . . I’ll admit it – there have been many a January when I conducted an online search on something like “create positive habits” . . . only to find a wide variety of suggestions, best strategies or top ten tips that sounded promising, but in reality didn’t help lead me to much change. I’m motivated to share what has helped…

Seeking Balance: Taking a Closer Look

My latest blog was posted on the Amsterdam Mamas website today (http://www.amsterdam-mamas.nl/stories/this-month/seeking-balance-taking-a-closer-look). In it, I reveal my own journey toward finding work-life balance and pass on some tips for how others can as well. You can also read it here . . . When both my kids attended elementary school, there was notably quite a bit more breathing room to gain more grip on the theme of…

Taming the cruel taskmaster, perfectionism

In my Nov. 22 blog post, I reflected on an important insight I learned from an interesting coaching technique, in short: cycles of change is what life is made of, and there’s no one perfect steady state. I also ruminated on the importance of focusing on process and not just the end product, which for some carries the highest possible standard. I suppose it’s becoming clear…

More on what drives our behavior (and learning from it)

In September, 2011, I read Frank van Marwijk’s article, “The effect of emotions on your decisions” (in Dutch at www.managersonline.nl). It supported Katie Byron’s work with the reminder that research has shown (Prof. Dr. Ap Dijksterhuis and Dr. Dan Hill concluded separately from each other) that for 95% of the time, people make decisions based on subconscious choices and emotions rather than rational thought processes. Consciously…