Staying connected with my partner

Staying connected with my partner

As a question to reflect on (not a test) . . . over the holidays, did you manage to connect and stay connected with the people who are MOST important to you? Read on to learn how I figured out a way for staying connected with my partner, and how you can, too. I find it so very intriguing. Over the course of my partnership (20+…

Connecting with Children in Need of Mourning

Connecting with Children in Need of Mourning

I was experiencing mixed emotions in anticipation of the day both my children stopped believing in Sinterklaas. On the one hand, I didn’t want the joy, the excitement, the “magic” to end for them. On the other hand, I was looking forward to the day I could have far more honest conversations with them, experience less pressure concerning filling their shoes AND to give them something…

Giving Thanks (or, how to express your appreciation to others)

Giving Thanks (or, how to express your appreciation to others)

It’s Thanksgiving in the U.S., and for me traditionally, that always meant coming together with family, sharing a ridiculously large meal made with care and love, and playing our favorite card games with lots of laughter. Of course they haven’t all been without their challenges. And more times than not, I wondered if we stopped to actually give thanks, show appreciation! Now that I live in…

Find connection with others

Find connection with others

Throughout my life, I’ve been labeled as an extrovert. It’s true that I really enjoy people and derive much energy from them . . . but not just anyone and not just anytime. I have to first feel safe and comfortable – unafraid of being unfairly judged or sudden conflict. These conditions which I’ve become aware of as an adult have made it practically impossible for…

How to get unstuck, gain balance, and feel more satisfied in life

How to get unstuck, gain balance, and feel more satisfied in life

Are you wondering how to get unstuck? Does this sound familiar? “I am always doing, in survival mode, juggling parenting, work, household duties, volunteering, social activities—and find myself in certain routines and patterns. How do I deal better with my chaotic and full head and experience more relaxation, satisfaction and balance in my life?” I asked myself a similar question the year I turned 40, engaged…

Why I started Mothers’ Circles

Why I started Mothers’ Circles

Consider the following words from Rumi: You were born with potential You were born with goodness and trust You were born with ideals and dreams You were born with greatness You were born with wings You are not meant for crawling, so don’t. You have wings Learn to use them, and fly. And these from Marianne Williamson: Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.…

Cultivating Compassion in the Workplace (why bother & taking a first step)

Cultivating Compassion in the Workplace (why bother & taking a first step)

  In the Fall of 2013, journalist Andy Fraser reported on his learnings at the Empathy and Compassion in Societyconference in London. He was interested in understanding more about why a recent Gallup poll had revealed that “just 13% of the world’s employees are engaged at work; about a quarter are ‘actively disengaged’ – unhappy, unproductive and liable to spread negativity to their colleagues.” He shared…

Applying NVC in Daily Parenting

Applying NVC in Daily Parenting

I don’t like to give the impression that I “know good parenting.” I don’t even believe in the concept of “good vs. bad” anymore – it’s the root of so much comparison, blame, pain in our lives. Even the current popular term, “positive parenting” feels too loaded to me. So when I saw this little gem on “effective parenting 101,” I was inspired to write about…

Unconditional Parenting in Practice

Unconditional Parenting in Practice

Ahh, playground politics! A friend of mine recently said to me, “I didn’t get this down when I was a kid, and now I have to re-live it as a mother!?” Who (among us who spend any time picking up our kids from a Dutch school) doesn’t relate to that, I wonder? Today I was confronted with a hefty dose of it and found myself mediating…

Alfie Kohn’s wisdom on Unconditional Parenting

Alfie Kohn’s wisdom on Unconditional Parenting

  Yesterday evening, I had the honor of hearing Alfie Kohn (author of “Unconditional Parenting” and other cutting edge books) speak. Passionate, energetic, interactive with his audience, and even capable of expressing some vulnerability – these are traits I long to see when I attend any lecture. And although he was a bit on the professorial side in his language, I was thoroughly engaged and entertained,…

12345